So here I am with the post that many of you are waiting for!
(Yaya self-delusion is
not a crime okays tsk~)
(Small request! Keep an
open mind while reading and keep all form of argument away from your head until you've read everything! Comment if there is anything you like to add on or
think is wrong! I can always learn new things!)
Welp+ Back to topic!
Fighting!
No no no, not hand to
hand combat or anything. What we are talking about here is when you want
somebody to fight for in/ you fighting for them. Fighting for love is what I’m
talking about basically.
So anyway correct me if I’m
wrong but we've seen it in the movies, we've heard it flying around in books
and stuff, but I’m pretty sure we've heard it coming out from a girls mouth
before. Not trying to be sexist here but put your hands on your heart and swear
that you've heard more guys say that then girls, I’ll give u a prize.
Jokes aside though, I
pretty sure we all liked to know what da
hell they want!
Pretty sure there are
many male out there looking for a solution to this “fighting” situation. Like
maybe a step by step action plan we can use to ‘Show’ that we are “Fighting” or
some form of prove that we are “Fighting”. In what cause or point in time do we “Fight”
for something?
E.g. ++ Male1 broke up with Female and after many months,
Female started courtship and date(s) with male2. Male1 returns to Female soon
after with no full knowledge of the r/s between male2 and Female. Female goes
back to Male1 but soon finds that she may still like male2.
Putting aside who is right or who
is wrong we come to a problem where both males decided to let the female to
choose who she wants to be with. This is where the fighting thing comes into
play. What are the males supposed to do at this point? In the words of Johnny
Depp.
So if we bring in “The Notebook”
and I quote the movie
“Young Noah: It's not about following your heart and
it's not about keeping your promises. It's about security.
Young Allie: What's that supposed to mean?
Young Noah: [yelling] Money. He's got a lot of money!
Young Allie: You smug bastard. I hate you for saying
that.
Young Noah: You're bored Allie. You're bored and you
know it. You wouldn't be here if there wasn't something missing.”
“Young Allie: What easy way? There is no easy way, no
matter what I do, somebody gets hurt.
Young Noah: Would you stop thinking about what
everyone wants? Stop thinking about what I want, what he wants, what your
parents want. What do YOU want? What do you WANT?
Young Allie: It's not that simple.
Young Noah: What... do... you... want? Whaddaya want?
Young Allie: I have to go now.”
I think we can all agree that he was fighting for their love, but was
he?
“Just picture your life for me? 30 years from now, 40
years from now? What's it look like? If it's with him, go. Go! I lost you once;
I think I can do it again. If I thought that's what you really wanted.”
If funny how when normal guys says
this kind of things he is giving up and “giving away” the one he loves and he
is somehow “weak”, but when they put a hunk on the big screens and says this he
is like some kind of bloody hero.
Putting the example in perspective let’s
review the case again
- ·
Both males
are under great emotional strain.
- ·
Male1 have
to come to terms that he had become a 3rd party
- ·
male2 have
to come to terms that he has not fully taken the female’s heart yet and had to
end his r/s so early
They both decide to let the female
choose who she wants to be with and are willing to let go with little
resistance. This is deemed unsatisfactory by the Female and she feels that they
both have no interest in the r/s and was unwilling to fight for it. I think we
can agree that both Males are hurt in this process and to add it on they know
each other which really complicate things. Not to say that the Female isn't
hurt or confused but was it wrong to let her choose?
I see it this way, nobody will ever
be willing to give what they think is their happiness away, but when push comes
to shove they will also hope that their happiness believes that it is them that
will bring joy to his/her world. She is their happiness, they will always choose
her but who she will choose to bring her joy and bliss is another thing. Just
like how we won’t let our parents help us find our life partners anymore. It
will never be a fair fight anyways. Male1 have been with her before and we can
guess that they know each other better than male2 knows her. I believe that there
will be too many ways Male1 could have totally dominate the playing field. As
they say
Hidden story here was that things
had not been as smooth when Male1 and Female was together, she had her own insecurities
and he had his but every time Female wanted to break up/ end things with him he
tried to talk to her and bring her back. Was that not fighting? Does fighting
always means loud angry voices screaming at each other to make them see sense,
or do small actions like this count too? The little things we do the small
actions we take behind the scenes.
Anyway feel free to comment in anon
or in person to discuss but pls pls pls do make sense in your arguments and no
just rage at everything I wrote. I’m not female and I can’t rep for the males this
are just some points I am putting across and things I would like to better know
so that I’m more experienced and ready when my next relationship comes and I
can handle it at a more mature level.
+To be used in place of
'well', when one feels there is no more to say. This word was originally
brought to the peoples' attention in 1994, from Jim Carrey in the cult classic,
Dumb & Dumber. This is simply one of the many words and phrases that
continue to be used in teen conversation today.
++This is an Example.
Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author’s
imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or
locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
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